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How do you use your head?

Volume 5, Number 2 February-March 2006 <= /span>

Greetings!

IN OUR HEADS WE INTEGRATE the information coming to us from our thoughts, our bodies, and the rest of the world. In this issue let's think about whether we use our heads to improve our lives or to anchor = us where we are.

Fear of looking stupid

RECENTLY, A CLIENT COMMENTED, "I realize I have a fear of looking stupid." We had been discussing different ways to learn and she knows that she learns best by experienc= ing and actually doing an activity. However, she holds herself back because= of her fear. We discussed whether she spends much time thinking about whet= her other people "look stupid." She laughed and said, "Oh, n= o, I don't. I encourage other people to try new things." We laughed abo= ut the reality that other people are probably too busy thinking about themselves and what they are doing to spend time watching her. She real= ized that this fear is like an anchor dragging her back and keeping her from= trying new experiences. Now, she is consciously beginning to do new activities= so she can expand her feelings of accomplishment and satisfaction with herself.

= IF LEARNING TO DRIVE A CAR was high on your list of wants you may identify with my story. My mother drove us to a straight 4-lane highway in the middle of the afternoon. First, she made me practice putting on the bra= ke. When she told me to put my foot on the accelerator lightly to start to = move forward I was so excited. Unfortunately, the car had a mind of its own. It would not go straight ahead. Howeve= r, I was highly motivated and we continued to practice until I was driving in the direction I wanted to go! I practiced driving until much of the information coming into my head from my senses was handled automaticall= y. Now, whenever I am learning something new I remember that my performance will improve with practice. Also, I have found that most people are wil= ling to help me learn how to do something when I ask for help. (Just learnin= g to ask for help was an important step for me.)

Self criticism

SASHA COHEN, WON THE 2006 SILVER OLYMPIC figure skating medal. She told reporters she us= ed to concentrate on her mistakes. Now, she concentrates on her successes.= We can all learn from what she shared.

= WHEN A SITUATION OCCURS THAT TRIGGERS AN AUTOMATIC reaction to criticize ourse= lves we can cancel that program like we cancel programs on the computer. We = can even tell ourselves to "Stop! Don't go down that path." If we take a deep breath, we can consciously decide to think about the situat= ion differently and choose a thought or action. The more often we change our thinking into a positive direction the easier it will be for us to stop criticizing ourselves and to act the way we want to be.

What about your comfort zone?

YOUR COMFORT ZONE is where the situati= on feels familiar. Frequently, clients express a reluctance to leave their comfort zone. They may feel afraid to risk leaving a familiar job or familiar relationship. One client told me recently that forcing herself= to take risks has been so rewarding and exhilarating. Now, new and exciting opportunities just keep on appearing. She went on to say, "Looking back I realize that I was not really comfortable in my comfort zone.&qu= ot;

= '"NOW IS A GOOD TIME to look at where you are in your life and ask, "Am I really comfortable or do I just feel safe because I am familiar with th= ese people and this situation?" Is your comfort zone anchoring you whe= re you are? Perhaps you are not willing to take a risk and try something different. If you want the results and experiences you have in 2006 to = be better, call me at 972.690.0442 to schedule a free coaching sess= ion.

Evaluate your career and life

LIST WHAT YOU ARE HAPPY ABOUT in your life and career. Be grateful and thankful for them. List what you wish was different in your life and career. List your dreams for yourself and what you would need = to have or do to accomplish them. Some activities you may have to put on h= old for now. However, is there something small that could be accomplished t= hat you can do now? Just writing these thoughts down on paper can help you = have a better perspective on how you are living your life.

= EVALUATE THE RELATIONSHIPS that you have in your career, family, and with others. Consider sharing with some of these people how valuable they are to your life. In addition, remember it is wise to develop new relationships that you value so you will have a richer life.

Tips to use your head positively <= /span>

Face your fears and= their impact on your life.
Remember you perform better as you practice.
Stop being overly critical of yourself and others.
Decide how to leave= your "comfort zone."
Concentrate on the positives in your life and be grateful.

Dr. Mary Alice Hurd

AS AN EXECUTIVE COACH AND LICENSED PSYCHOLOGIST, Mary Alice integrates her experience as an organizational psychological consultant and 30 years as a psychology professor at Sout= hern Methodist University. She received her coaching training in the MentorCoach progra= m. Mary Alice has been coaching over the phone since 2001. (For further details click on biography.)

= MARY ALICE IS AFFILIATED with Success Discoveries. Success Discoveries is a consortium of highly-qualified independent coaches representing multiple coaching specialities. As a collaborative team they provide a broad wealth of knowledge and expertise for the benefit of corporate and individual clients. Click on= www.suc cessdiscoveries.com for more information.

Create the life your want

ONE CLIENT WHO IS RECREATING HER LIFE wrote: "I hig= hly recommend Mary Alice as a coach who ensures your professional and personal development. The growth that Mary Alice provides her clients= is extraordinary!"

S= TART TO CREATE THE LIFE YOU WANT by scheduling a free coaching sess= ion with DR. MARY ALICE HURD.

P= HONE MARY ALICE TODAY at 972.690.0442 or email her at maryalice@successdi= scoveries.com.

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email: maryalice@successdiscoveries.com

phone: 972-690-0442

web: http://www.pilot-your-life.com
http://www.successdiscoveries.com

S= PRING IS COMING NEXT MONTH. Many of us have been thinking in terms of relationships and how we are grateful for some of them but want to improve and/or develop new ones during the rest of 2006. <= /span>

Y= OU COULD USE A free coaching session to discuss where you are and where you want to be in your life. Phone me at 972.690.0442 to schedu= le an appointment. Mary Alice

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